Wednesday, 6 March 2013

One day I will fly

I've been reading old posts, looking back at my thoughts on church and my Pastor.  Before I left, I never wrote in depth about my church or the leadership, but there are a few posts with hints of the pastor/hero-worship issue I had and the control - only hints and I certainly painted life as wonderful. 

Having been very isolated at church and having been not allowed to attend other churches unless I was on holiday I was very naive.  But I thought ours was the only church on earth.

In a way, I long for those rose coloured spectacles to be back on, to be the naive congregant, who only saw the nice stuff that went on in my church, who thought her Pastor was truly a loving gentle man with almost no sin (! I know!).

But it's too late.  My eyes have been opened.

Jesus was right when He said the truth shall set you free.  It's frightening to be free though. Like a animal which has been caged for a long time, to be introduced to the wild.  The door's open, sometimes I leave the cage for a sniff around, but most of the time I'm still in the cage.  It feels safe.

But one day...I will fly.

Originally written 6/3/13 posted here 28/3/14

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